Building Positive Relationships

• Be a great listener!  Most people love to talk about themselves.
  
• Remember to say "please" and "thank you".
  
• Ask people questions which begin with the words "what" and "how".  For example, "What happened?"  or "How did that happen?"  What and how questions encourage discussion.
  
• Remember that much of your communication is non-verbal.  Eye contact, head nodding, smiles, an other body language are powerful means of communication.
  
• Paraphrase back what others have said to you.
  
• Use "I" statements instead of "you" statements.  When we use "you" statements they are frequently followed by absolute phrases, such as "you always, you never, you ought, you should, you need".  These phrases often lead to defensive responses.  "I feel, I think, I want, I believe" are usually better ways to start sentences.
  
• Learn to praise and accept praise.
  
• Be tolerant of the weaknesses in others.
  
• Be tolerant of your own weaknesses.
  
• Life in an echo: we usually receive what we give.  If we give hope, joy, love, compassion, optimism, humor, and help, we receive those responses from others.
  
• Treat others special.
  
• Treat yourself special.
  
• Learn to say no.  If you do not respect yourself, others will not respect you.
  
• Make time for yourself.
  
• Make time for others.
  
• Fill your life with optimism and hope.  Others love to be around people who are upbeat.
  
• Frequently make a mental gratitude list.  Concentrate on your assets instead of liabilities.  Enjoy simple things in life such as the sunrise, a rose, snow, a cool breeze, and the warm rays of sunshine.  Life is filled with so many simple pleasures.
  
• Come to accept the fact that some of life's conflicts may never be resolved.
  
• Do not try to change things that you cannot change.  To do so is a waste of energy.
  
• Learn to set limits with yourself and others.
  
• Have at least one person who loves you and cares for you.
  
• Finish unfinished business.
  
• Smile often.
  
• Pat yourself and others on the back frequently.  Be specific with praise.  Remember, rewarded behavior is often repeated.
  
• Offer your point of view with asked for it.  Refrain from preaching; instead, speak in a confident but caring way.
  
• Realize you are not perfect and you will never be perfect.  Sometimes you will be angry, moody, impolite, and inappropriate.  We are human.  Forgive yourself and move on.
  
• Yesterday ended with you went to bed last night
  
• Realize you are responsible for your thoughts and actions. No one can force you to behave in a particular manner.  Life is a choice.  You will not always be able to choose circumstances, but you can choose how well you respond to those circumstances.
  
• When others criticize you, do your best not to react, but respond in a way that you can learn and grow from the criticism.
  
• All of us are a mix of positive and negative, but most people have many more positives than negatives.
  
• Refrain from jumping to conclusions.  Check out what others' motives are before judging them.
  
• Treat all people with dignity and respect.  People are important.